Originally posted by Gaafa The Director is finished - You are now God!

My long-time stage manager won't even let me backstage as a director once the production is audience-ready.  Of course, there is a mutual respect for each other between us, and as a couple of the earlier posters put it, the show and the patrons come first.

You are the authority if your director and board have any sense of theatre and priorities.

k8tt,

Wow, I really feel for you. It really cheeses me off when someone not only doesn't want to do their job, but they disrespect someone else's job as well. If things went as you described, he should have been bounced out on his ear.

He should be out of your way, if he's going to behave that way. And the lame medication excuse: if he cannot control himself as a rational adult, he shouldn't be backstage, period. Take it to everyone in the group that is supposed to be an authority above you and the director. They need to back you up, if they understand theatre at all. If they as a whole want to choose a director who approves of unprofessional activity over a competent stage manager who is trying to do her job, you really need to question whether you want to stick with them (after you finish this show, of course).

Sorry for the rant -- this is just a hot button issue with me. I'm usually the peacemaker on my shows when friction occurs, but I draw the line when it comes to that kind of abuse. I don't let someone get away with stepping on good people, regardless of what my actual authority is in the show.

-Tom

I have nothing really to add- everyone else has said what needs to be said- except don't get discouraged!  In my experience as an actor, I've always been impressed by the occasional SM who truly, deeply cares about the show and shows it; he/she is the biggest motivator possible to the rest of the team.  There's nothing quite like a spirited SM.  This guy's a jerk, and you're absolutely in the right to take pride in the value of the production. 

Well I have my 2 cents to add.....along the lines of what "Topper" said.  I am the female manager of a construction company and despite the bad rap that construction workers get, 99% of the time I am treated with respect.  On the few occasions I have run into a new employee or a subtrade worker who makes a "pussy" comment I fire them or throw them off of the site.  Works every time.

I realize that you can't "fire" a volunteer but I just wanted you to know that you don't have to take his disrespect.  It's not 1950 anymore for crying out loud.

Thanks so much for all the support!  I really need it.  Our theatre group is small, in a small town, and we scrape the bottom of the barrel for volunteers. Right now I am ignoring the jerk.  He ignores me, has not said a word, but I catch him staring at me.  Scary.  I now have a list of who I will not work with in the future.

But at the matinee today I will have to speak to the stage crew boys who are back to chattering away and broke the concentration of the leads last night.  It's the 14 - 20 year olds that can't control themselves.  I have FIFTEEN teens backstage and eleven kids under 13.  I'm taking a witch's hat today and will use humor to get their attention.

The Board meets in 10 days and I will bring this up.  The Director ALWAYS comes backstage.  Surprised me the first time, but she just HAD to give notes.  I kick her out occasionally.  We have had a good working relationship up until this problem.

I am very thankful for my wonderful leads (7 of them) and costume crew who have rallied around me.

Thank you for this forum!