Maybe you lost a role unnecessarily.  Your director probably didn't expect you to REALLY KISS him.  I could be wrong, but I think that no director would expect you to lay a real kiss on a fellow actor.  If your director has had any stage direction training at all s/he should know how to direct you to stage a kissing scene so that both party's faces are concealed and FAKE it very convincingly. 

On the other hand, maybe you would even be uncomfortable with a very convincing fake kiss, yeah?  Maybe just the close proximity with a guy that much older than you is inappropriate. I would certainly be able to see your point there.  But I also think that if it were me directing I'd want the kiss, too, so I would probably try to cast two people more appropriately aged.

We had a 14 year old audition for the part of Adelaide in Guys and Dolls in our community theatre one year.  She had a hard time understanding that the rest of our cast was pretty well into middle age and it wouldn't have been appropriate for her to play opposite 49 year old Nathan Detroit!  There was no way I could offer her the part she wanted so we offered her a part in the chorus which she declined. (What was the girl thinking!)

How old are you?

I agree (as in Kathy S's example), that a very young person (under, say, 16 or so) should not be cast in an adult role with an adult cast....generally doesn't work for many reasons....just not appropriate.

But why did you audition for a role you could not morally do? Was it just the age of the guy? Were you not aware a kissing scene would be required?

What ever the reasons, you went after the part, and they cast you...If you are refusing to do something called for in the script..the director is within her/his rights to remove you. You do  not have the option of rewriting parts.

There is nothing wrong with morals....However, if you intend to act in the future....be aware of what is required for each part before you audition...If a simple kiss upsets you, you need to be sure to read scripts and make directors aware of your "will not's" before casting.

By the way, I have directed for many years, at many levels (high school, college, community and semi professional) and have always used "real" kisses if a kiss was called for in the script...it is just acting, after all. In over 20 years, no one has ever expected or requested a fake kiss. Not even in high school productions.

Good luck,

Countbio

Hi Juliet,

I agree with Kathy S. When I have to cast a part that involves romance I try to cast close to the same age. I did have a time when I directed Our Town that I cast a 30 year old George! (Who knew! He looked younger then her.) She was 17. I spoke with her and her mother. I must say he was more concerned then she was. We blocked the scene upstage and staged the kiss. All went well.

When I did Guys and Dolls my Sky Masterson was having a terrible time kissing Sarah Brown. He was okay after her husband shouted out during rehearsal, "For gods sake kiss her, so we can go home."

So Juliet don't worry. There will be other times and other plays. In the future take a look at the part ahead of time. If kissing on stage makes you uncomfortable ask the director before you audtion what he expects. Then you will know if the part is right for you.

L.

I am 14 years old, but look 16-18, and the director figured i was sixteen. I had no idea that I was gonna get winnie, so i accepted the part without thinking. I had always figured that it wouldn't be hard to work around the kiss or do a very convincing fake one(as kathy said). The theater that's doing it is a college theater, so the people playing the older parts are in their twenties. I am tall and wellshaped and do not look 14 years old, plus my voice is matured beyond my age. This may be why he thought I wasn't 14.  

As for him expecting me to do a real kiss, he definitely did. He said the parts would lose realism, which i can kind of see his point, but still think it could've been worked around.

Maybe the director didn't know. I don't ask for actual age on my audition form. I ask, "What age range can you play?" If the range I see on the form and the person in front of me auditioning don't match I make a note on the form. Sometimes I have to ask. . . I had women audition to play the part of Cinderella who was old enough to be my mother. I had to ask. Yes, that was the part she wanted. Talk about living in a dream world!

L.

Talk to the AGYG director. He and the artsitic director may have already talked. You would have a blast doing the Music Man. I am directing it right now. The kids are having a great time. Remember, even though it feels personal, it is most likely not personal. It is about what is best for the show.

I can tell you from a director's point of view the way you handle this will play a part in the future. The director gave you a choice. You made your decision. Now everyone is moving on. Decide which show you want to do. Put a smile on your face and have fun.

Linda

The mistake probably was in the casting (And that is not intended as an insult at all) Whenever that happens at our theater, it is the Director's responsiblity to point out any kissing scenes, etc in the play and then you decide if that is a part you would be comfortable in doing. I applaud your morals.

However, I will say this to anyone else reading my post and once again this is not intended as an insult to anyone, but do keep in mind that this is acting. There are certain parts I would never accept in theater or probably even a few plays I wouldn't ever consider trying out for but you are playing a character, not necessarily a representation of your true self. I tend to be casted in a lot of con artist roles, lol  

It is very possible to do a fake kiss and have it look good - ussually even better than a real kiss because I find 'real' kisses on stage look fake because they're awkward.

My mom was in a show a few years ago and ended up getting Hepititis (whichever form is carried by mouth) from her leading man.  The show was cancelled because most of the cast was down (British farce - everyone kissed everyone). 

Ever since then I try to avoid real kisses.

My personal opinion - if this was community theatre they should have made it work for you - and they should have been proud to have a girl in their cast who has strong morlas - not many teens do these days.

Here's two cents from the midwest.

I cast based upon the best auditioner for the role. Period.

The show I am directing now calls for a newlywed couple.  She wants a baby, he's dragging his feet, "we don't have enough money".  Everyone thought our company "ingenue" was a lock for the role.

Not so- I ended up with a mid-30s wife and an over 40s husband.  I simply cast the best people.  At other times I've had under 20s playing mothers of teenagers and once a 14 year old boy as an 80 year old man.  They all worked great!

On the kiss front: I avoid the real deal.  (I agree they can look faker than a fake one.)  I wouldn't expect actors to use a real gun, drink real booze or really hit each other for the sake of "realism".   I do ask auditioners questions about things I think might be a problem, language, will you color/cut hair, etc.  So I usually know in advance.

For the rest: If you approach the director politely it is unlikely that they will mind you switching to Music Man (unless you are set to open this weekend).    It seems like it will probably reduce some stress!   When you have this conversation make sure the Stage manager  (or Artistic Director) is present, and maybe even bring Mom?

Good luck!